Bayram Cigerli Blog

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Witt Reviews Holdren's "Injury Impoverished"

John Fabian Witt, Yale Law School, has posted Radical Histories/Liberal Histories in Work Injury Law, a review forthcoming in the American Journal of Legal History of Nate Holdren’s Injury Impoverished: Workplace Accidents, Capitalism, and Law in the Progressive Era:

Nate Holdren has written a brilliant, impassioned, and intellectually stimulating book on the legal history of industrial accidents. According to Holdren, work injuries were at their core a form of labor exploitation. He describes the law of work accidents as a machinery of injustice that bolstered the legitimacy of a violent and inhuman capitalist system. He fiercely critiques the workers’ compensation reforms enacted by progressive reformers a century ago as legitimating a form of systematic labor violence. He insists on recognizing and attending to the dignity of each accident victim, both in the content of his argument and as a matter of literary form. Injury Impoverished is a welcome if unsettling rebuke to complacent accounts of the field, perhaps my own among them. But Holdren’s analysis also raises many questions. Holdren attributes little value to the dramatically safer workplaces of the middle of the twentieth century. His cautious admiration for the litigation system of the years before workers’ compensation rests on a fantastical conception of the way 19th-century tort law actually worked. He calls for an impossibly demanding form of "justice as recognition" from the law. He misses the ways in which workers co-opted new forms of accident law and turned them to their own interests. And his single-minded focus on commodification and the point of production leads him to discount the surrounding political and legal institutions that shaped the social meaning of work injuries.

--Dan Ernst

Hi Ho, Hi Ho

I work with 7 guys. It's a bit like this:


Except there are not any deer.

We work in a small office with a long double-sided shared desk, which means I have someone on my left, right and center by about 1 - 2 feet. We can hear everything that the other people are saying. In addition to that, we have the TV on all day on CNBC or Bloomberg, plus we have a thing called the Hoot, which is basically like a CB channel where traders and other people can broadcast things and communicate with each other. It gets a bit loud sometimes.

Men, as you may know, are very simple. They basically talk about three things: money, women and food. When they get mad at each other, they lay it all out there. Fortunately, although I am generally pretty passive aggressive, this situation works for me. You just say what you mean and if someone has a problem with it, they say so, and then you get over it. It's much more efficient that the way that women do it.

However, it is funny how although men are not as bad at back stabbing or talking behind other people's backs, they do it from time to time. That is part of the problem of working so closely together every day. You really have to get along pretty well and carry your own weight, or it affects the entire group. There is one guy who is not quite there, as in he does things halfway and does not pull his own weight, and it really changes the feeling in the room.

I hear a lot of things in that room. I hear the F word at least a dozen times a day (and the S word? too many times to count). I hear the guys talk about their dates, how hot the new newscaster is on CNBC, or how their wife leaves the peanut butter knife out on the counter. They joke around with each other if one of them wears a pink tie or gets a new haircut. They talk about bathroom functions. I hear and know everything about them. And they are like family to me. You know how your brothers always annoyed you but you loved them just the same? That's how it is with these guys. They are my seven annoying, funny, lovable dwarfs. And I am Snow White.

What is your work setting like? Do you work in close quarters with the people you work with? Do you get along with everyone?

Loneliness, Hard Work, and Giving Thanks


I am inundated with thoughts as I sit down to write this blog post. I am unsure how title it correctly; I want to write about my loneliness, finally working hard, and giving thanks for the new and surprising blessings in my life. It is always so easy to focus on the negative going on in our lives. I find myself doing that sometimes and I shouldn't. That is not how I operate. That is not how I live my life.

I am lonely a lot of times now. I would say I have been feeling this way for a little over a month. The "official" definition of 'lonely' is: being sad because one has no friends or company. I feel a bit dramatic calling myself that, but at times, it feels true. I am a natural born extrovert, but I enjoy being alone as well. However, when you live alone, you get a lot of time to be by yourself so I enjoy being around people when I can. It happens everyday at work and then everyday at the gym. A lot of times now, even though I am around a lot of people, I feel really alone. I am happy with my life - I am excited. I work constantly, be it at work or my weight loss journey, I am very productive, but I am lonely. I am not complaining, I am simply stating a fact. 

Here is a downfall about me: I have always worried more about a social life than working hard. When I started high school and all throughout my life since then, my social life has always come before anything. Since I dream so big and so hard, that is probably the worst things I could do. I have huge things I want to do and all of them are really, really hard. I want to become an author - write a memoir as well as fictional series, grow this blog and eventually create and sell fitness products (like a cookbook, fitness clothing, and fitness tools (health journals, exercise guides, etc), and travel doing motivational speeches. That is a lot of hard damn work right there. Obtaining those things is going to require a lot sacrifice, hard work, and long hours. Talk about "blood, sweat, and tears". For about a month now, for the first time in my life, I have really started working hard to accomplish those dreams.

And I realize what a lonely path I have chosen. 

However, I feel it is lonely in a good way though. There have been so many changes in my personal life right now, that I really can't keep up anymore. My father is terminally ill, his wife, my step-mother, just lost her sister, my mother is going through a lot of issues within herself and her life (which really breaks me down), and my grandmother is having such a hard time with my grandfather who recently fell into a glass table and broke his leg, knee, and cut his body really bad.  My immediate family has so much going on right now and so many issues of their own. Then there are friends. I am the type of person who considers friends, family. Growing up, I was always with my friends on holidays. I do not have a big family so I have always been a girl who is surrounded by a ton of friends. I am 24 years old - soon to be 25, and having friends now is not the same as it was a few years ago. Most everyone I know is engaged, getting married, and having children. They have their own lives and families now, and being a friend is not what it used to be. Then there are really close friends who change. There are friends who you love more than anything, you think you know them inside and out, and it turns out you really didn't. It's truly shocking when you love someone so much and one day you realize how little they love you. One of my good blogger friends Nadine said to me the other day "I really found out who my friends were in my 20's". 

With all of that being said, it has been a difficult transition for me over the past month. For the first time in my life, I am truly becoming independent and strong on my own to feet. I have lived alone and been financially independent since I was 20 years old, but I have always been surrounded by a big social circle. Now I am doing more things alone. I am not afraid to do that anymore like I used to be. If I want to do something, I don't depend on anyone, I go do it. I have been disappointed a lot lately. It is hard sometimes, but I know it has made me a stronger person.

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to do big things. It's easy to dream and I did plenty of it. That is all I have done my entire life. My dreams were always pushed to the side though because it requires so much hard work. I had the ideas, but I did not want to sacrfice anything to obtain them. I was too caught up in the "now". What was I doing this weekend? What are we doing tonight? Plan this trip, plan that trip. That was all that mattered to me.

Now I want all of that to change.

I am beginning to understand that if I throw myself into my work, make sacrifices now, and at least try for all of these dreams and aspirations I have, in the future, I will be able to do all of the "fun" things I want. I remember when I was 18 years old, I was working at a typical corporate company part-time while I was going to school. I only lasted there 3 months, I hated it. Everyday there, people looked miserable. They complained constantly about their jobs and lives, they gossiped a lot about each other, and lived for Friday. I don't want my life to end up that way. And if I don't, I have to do something about it.

Thankfully, my current job keeps growing. I have been at my company over 6 months now. This job changed my life. The story of how I landed this position is a crazy one... and someone up above was looking out for me when I got it. Obtaining this job launched my weight loss journey and really helped me believe in myself after I had forgotten what that was like. I feel a part of something bigger than myself, I am stimulated, challenged, and motivated. I am given immense freedom and creativity, and I am getting assigned bigger and bigger projects and tasks. I want to keep growing and improving myself there, losing weight, and working on my other plans (such as this blog, of course) at night and on the weekends. For the first time in my life, that is what I have been doing and even though it is really lonely, I feel like if I keep working hard and trying, something big will finally happen.

That leads me to giving thanks, even though my heart is heavy a lot of times. I am thankful to have this change in my personal life because it is very new to me. Sometimes I have wanted to break down, and the tears have flown, but I refuse to let it tear me apart. I am seeing this "loneliness" as a time to better myself and finally try for the life that I feel is meant for me.


What a whirlwind of a week!

Hello Friday. Hello blog. I am exhausted.

I mentioned on Sunday that I would be a little MIA due to a nonstop week at work. It turned out to be busier than I thought. I have been planning a big company event for over a month now. I have done it all myself, too. Which I love that my President gives me that freedom. Event planning is serious business though; one can easily forget about all of the trivial details that you need to pay attention too! Thankfully, it all wonderfully came together. I did all of it in heels, too. My feet are swollen today. 

Monday was a pretty normal day. A little busier than usual, but not too bad. I worked out after and made sure to get in bed early. Tuesday, the chaos began. Executives were coming into town, all of the department managers were finishing presentations and needing assistance, I had to put packets together, and the list could go on. One of fun tasks on my to-do list? Shopping for the strategic meeting dinner for Wednesday. I do the shopping - I do the choosing, ha!


Wednesday was a long, long day. I worked 13 hours. It was the day before our event. I spent most of the day at my bosses farm home about an hour south of Charlotte in rural, SC. The executives were there for an offsite strategic planning meeting. I was there assisting, recording meeting minutes, and other random things. My President told me that he wanted me to create and run a blog for the company that will act as a liaison between clients, potential clients, and employees. I was very surprised to hear that, but how fitting, huh? I am so, so excited about this and I hope to "blow it out of the water". I will absolutely be putting my heart and soul into that for sure - more on that next week. Around 3PM I left the farm house, drove back Charlotte, ran some errands, did a run through of the event at the hotel, helped setup, then drove back to farm house in SC. After the meeting finished, we grilled out and enjoyed the beautiful weather.






Wednesday night I finally got to bed close to midnight. Oy. Yesterday was the big company event! I found my favorite headband that has been missing for about two months so I had to wear it. I knew then that it was going to be a good day. 


The meeting went great. The hotel was incredibly beautiful, we had a wonderful view, and stellar service. I did not want it to end. We had creative presentations, team building activities, games and prizes, and I felt like it really brought us together as a company. I am really tired, but I will miss all of the planning and meetings that went along with this. 





Now I'm ready to knock out this day at work and get some rest and relaxation this weekend. Plus catch up on your guys blogs. Don't forget about my Quest Nutrition giveaway going on right now! Get your entries in!

All About My Week: Exhausted!

Whew.

It is Friday evening and my week is done. I am deliriously tired. It has been a nonstop, crazy, busy, but productive and positive week. I have worked nonstop between my job and the gym.

The majority of my week was devoted to setting up, running, and being involved at a leadership workshop for management; and then a communication workshop for employees. It was 3 all-day events that required a lot of preparation. My role is steadily growing at work and I truly could not be more thrilled. However, that combined with my weight loss journey gets exhausting, but I push on. I know it's worth it.

The workshops were Wednesday, Thursday, and today. Monday and Tuesday I spent majority of my days handling the logistics of everything. Part of that was purchasing refreshments for morning and afternoon breaks. Look at this pure torture that was in my car...


I did pretty good at staying away from most it; but I did sneak a brownie bite... or two. Ha. Tuesday afternoon as I was putting all of the pamphlets together and organizing our meeting rooms, I decided to get a little creative. I could tell a few of the department manager's were not looking forward to the workshops so I put an inspirational business related quote with the binders. It may be cheesy, but I like it. Others did as well.


Wednesday was day one of the management workshop. I of course, had to look my best. I also wore my new shirt that I have had for a week and worn probably 4 times now, ha. I can't help it, it has quickly turned into my favorite! The leadership workshop was really fun to me. I thrive in group settings especially when discussing business. I am the youngest manager by a long shot at my company; so I really made a point to ensure I was assertive and participate. People noticed. It was great!


Today was probably the most exhausting of days. All of the overtime from the week was catching up with me and I had a lot to do. After my morning meeting with my President, I took off to a 5-star hotel down the road from my office to negotiate with a sales manager about renting one of their ballrooms for my company's big quarterly meeting next month. We worked everything out and I cannot be more excited to hold our event here. The place is called "The Ballantyne Hotel". It is absolutely beautiful! The President stayed there when he was in Charlotte last year. We have a great room with a gorgeous view. I think everyone will really enjoy it.


This afternoon I picked up my new guitar. I have sang and written music my entire life. I played piano for 5 years also when I younger; but I did not enjoy it. I always wanted to play the guitar, but my parents would not let me. I have no idea why. For a few years I pondered the idea of playing the acoustic guitar but did nothing about it. Then this past Christmas time the thought of learning to play was eating me alive; but I still did not pursue it. However, now I feel it is the time.

The main reason I want to do it is for some emotional fulfillment. I am healing from my break up; it's been 6 months now, but it is still really hard on me at times. I live away from all of my family as well. Plus I live alone. I have a lot of friends, all of whom I absolutely adore, but sometimes I feel like something is still missing. There is still a hole in my heart. Exercising is my favorite hobby to do; but one can only train so much. I am very grateful and have a very full life with my job, weight loss and training, friends and going out, but I need to have something that I truly love - that relaxes me but still gives me hope. Something to ease my mind. Right now that is not a man or a partner. I feel it's music. Music was my first love in life; but it scares me because I do love it so much. As I have been healing from my break up, losing weight again, and adjusting to the abundance of changes in my life, I have written many, many songs. I have a voice to go with the songs, now I just need to the instrument to bring everything together. I have my first lesson this upcoming Thursday and I truly can't wait. I want to be the female version of Aaron Lewis. This video here moves me like no other. The day I post a video of me singing and playing this song will be the day all of my dreams come true, ha!




I am off to pick up dinner then start learning on my guitar a little bit. Have a great weekend everyone.

It has been a really weird week (Friday 5)

We are at another Friday. Thank goodness. One of my best friends is coming down to stay the weekend with me, which of course I am excited about, but I am most excited about sleeping in. (Ha, love you Jen!) This week has been okay, but just... odd. I think it's mainly due to my own mental state. I can be pretty crazy, I suppose.

Sunday night, (1)I got an email from my step-mom telling me my dad is not doing well. My father has been battling cancer since basically 2006. It isn't curable, it is in his bones and keeps spreading. In November he started having really bad seizures. The doctor's did MRI's and found a brain tumor. To me, that was not a huge deal. He also had a brain tumor in September of 2011, the doctor's removed it via surgery, and dad lead a mostly normal life. That was all they would need to do again. He went in for surgery the week before last and the doctor's could not remove the tumor. The MRI was wrong (that only happens 15% of the time - my family's luck) and the tumor was too far into his brain to be removed. Since the surgery he keeps going back to Duke for more and more tests. As of right now, there are not a lot of options to help him and he continues to have seizures regularly. 

That broke me down. I have never had to deal with death before. I am 24 years old and my father is dying of cancer and my mother is sick with MS - both incurable. And I'm getting really damn bitter. I'm single, live alone, have no partner to be my rock during these times, and I was getting so mad at God. I'm too young to lose them. My father will most likely never walk me down the aisle or see a grandchild (I am his only child). It's just really hard. However, instead of asking "why me", I have to look at is "why not me". This is life. This free will... things like this happen. And I know there a lot of people out there who have never had parents or lost their parents way before I will. I know many, many people have it much worse than I do, it's just hard to look at the big picture like that sometimes. I apologized for blaming God and I am just trying to be the best daughter I can. My dad loves "The Beatles" so I have a DVD on the way to his house for him. I'm sure that will make him cheer up, at least a little.

That's all I want to say about that. I hate even talking about it on my blog. I just really think that is what threw me off this week. You guys have been so supportive and loving and I really appreciate it. Moving on...

(2) I am still trucking along on my weight loss journey. Finally I am starting to feel differences in my clothing. For a while I noticed differences naked and on the scale, but clothes - not so much. I am wearing shirts and jeans that have been put a way for a long time. I am really excited about the below white shirt. I love to wear white, but when my stomach and arms became bigger, I avoided it like the plague. I go for my weigh in later today and truth be told, I will be happy to be down a pound. I wanted to completely kick ass this week, but it didn't happen. I did good, but not as good as I should have.



Tuesday morning, I was still an emotional mess. My adorable angel, Marty was being so clingy. I could not get ready without him rubbing up against my legs wanting attention. (3) I was an awful mom. I was getting irritated with him and yelled at him because he almost tripped me up. On my way to work, I was in tears because I yelled at him. Am I psycho or what? It was eating away at me because I love my cat so much and I would never yell at him. I went home on my lunch and played with him then bought him catnip. When I got home from the gym Tuesday night, I let the water run from the sink (his favorite in the world) extra long as well. I think he has since forgiven me.



Wednesday I was a (4) I was so proud of my steal at GNC. As a lot of my fitness girls know, Quest Bar now has a new flavor out: cookies and cream. I for one am obsessed with it. It is absolutely delicious. So of course I needed to add a few to my stash at work. They were buy 3 get 1 free, my pre-workout (Lipo 6x black - I hate taking powder) was on sale, I had a $10 off my total purchase coupon, and they gave me a lot of free samples! I saved so much money. I was extremely proud! I love saving money, ha!



All of that prompted for a kick ass work out at the gym later. I started core workout's twice a week a couple of weeks ago, and I am really pleased at how strong I am getting. I stopped doing core work for a long time. There is no real reason as to why I stopped, but I know I needed to get back to it. Planks are becoming easier and I go longer... it's been a great feeling.


(5)Yesterday I had my 90-day review with my HR mentor and my boss. It is hard to believe that I have been with my company for 90 days. Do you guys remember me telling you the incredible story of how I even came about this job? If not, read it here. It was really and truly fate and God's work. My boss took me out to a delicious lunch, we had the review, and things are great. This job saved me in many ways. Even if some of my employee's are mad at me because the new shipment of paper towels does not have designs on them! (I am not even joking)

I got my booty up bright and early this morning to get some cardio before work. My best friend and I hate working out first thing but we pushed through!


I have my vitamin injection and weigh in at 12:45 so wish me luck, After work, I am getting in a lift session at the gym, then wait for Jen to get into town. Don't forget to link up today! I hope you guys have a great weekend! 

Twas the week before Christmas and it's been nonstop!

Hello my loves! How is everyone doing this week? My week has been fantastic but nonstop. But now that I think of it, when is it ever? It is a good thing I am a naturally hyper person, otherwise I would not be able to keep up. I am stoked the Friday is almost here and that it will be another two weeks before I have a full work week again. Christmas and New Years will be here in the blink of an eye so that is wonderful and I am getting my hair done tonight - touching up my roots and getting the red streaks re-added. Ah! I am so happy, lots of awesome things going on!
Image Map

I bought a new table last week. I found it on Craigslist for $60. I then found two chairs on Amazon for $43 plus free two-day shipping with my Amazon prime. To complete my dining room, I needed to find the perfect centerpieces which I showed you guys on Sunday from the weekend blog entry. That totaled only $25. My chairs unfortunately arrived late so I did not receive them until Monday (it was supposed to be Friday) thankfully, I have an amazing boss who put them together for me! It was hilarious seeing the president of my company in a suit and tie putting together dining room chairs in his office. 

Since I am a diva on a budget, I am excited to say my dining room is finally complete and I only spent $128.00 on all of my dining attire!


I go to my wellness clinic on Monday's to receive my B12 injection. Since I have been back on track 100% with health and fitness and just overall trying to improve myself from a rough year, I have them weigh me. I lost 3.5 pounds last week! My total pounds down in the last 21 days= 14.1! How amazing. I am so excited! I cannot wait to keep going. I feel so damn good. I feel better about myself than I have in a long, long time.


I know my muscle is looking semi pathetic, but I have lost a lot of fat in them. My arms are a big trouble spot for me, along with my lower stomach, so seeing this progress means a lot!

My company had our holiday luncheon and 2014 benefits meeting yesterday. Since I am the Office mom, I mean manager, I had to order the food, set up everything, and then clean it all. Our company has 50 employees and cleaning up after Hurricane "Holiday lunch" was absolutely exhausting. Thankfully it went smoothly, we had a lot of fun, everyone brought delicious holiday desserts (that I did NOT partake in), and our company is growing. I was proud of my decor!


We had a local italian company cater pizza for our luncheon today and everyone brought a holiday dessert. I normally let myself have two "cheat meals" a week so I decided to make yesterday one of them. Usually my "cheat meals" are like a steak and bleu salad from Panera or a grilled chicken panini - nothing too heavy or crazy. However, I love pizza and I hear good things about this company so I decided to go for it. I had two slices of mushroom and cheese pizza and I. was. miserable. I do not eat a lot of carbohydrates. I certainly do not deprive myself, but I just do not want to eat them. After I ate, I was literally falling asleep. I absolutely hated the way I felt. My body is clean of the grease and toxins now, so I just felt crappy after. Most days I have a vegetarian meat substitute (such as GardenIn products) for lunch and a side of vegetables. I feel extremely energetic after, I never crash or get fatigued, but I did today. Luckily, I was so miserable after that I did not partake in the desserts. I will save my treats for my mother's amazing treats on Christmas! Before this was never me. And seeing these changes are absolutely incredible.


Last weekend I decided to get groceries at Target since I was there getting a lot of other things anyway. I was so surprised, the prices are fantastic and they had a lot of items that I was not familiar with. One of them being a flat bread with brie and balsamic vinegar. Holy mother of tastebuds, it was the most delicious flat I have ever eaten! Half of it is only 350 calories and it goes perfect with a side salad. If you have a Target near you, go try it ASAP! 
That is all I have for now!

10 Days of Thanksgiving: Day 6, 7 & 8

There are only two more days until Thanksgiving! And so many more than two more things to be thankful for! Here are a few more things that I am happy about this year!
 
6. Employment

We tend to take this for granted, but after having several months off, I don't sneer at a steady income. Of course, I am still keeping an eye out for the perfect traveling, photography, writing job with good pay, so if you know of an opportunity for that, let me know.

7. Having a 401k

When I was 18 and I was getting my first corporate job, an older friend of the family told me to put at least as much money into my 401k every month as the company would match. He suggested putting more if I could, but that I should at least put in the company match, since if I didn't I would be essentially throwing away free money. He was right, and now I am giving the same advice to people just starting out in their first big job.

8. Travel

Clearly these all go hand in hand. Whatever money I am gaining from employment and not putting into my 401k is going toward as much travel as I can do! Some years it's more than others and this year has been a bit slower than normal, but I have been lucky to both do some traveling around my home state as well as doing  some visiting with friends and family around the country. I hope I will continue to make time for travel, as it is something I really love! 

Kansas City

Washington DC

Oregon

Yosemite

Do you have a 401k? Did you do any fun traveling this year?

It's Causal

I have had a lot of questions lately about what form of transportation I use when I go into the city. I sometimes take the bus, sometimes the BART, but mostly I use the Casual Carpool (you can also take a boat if you are so inclined). People can understand the bus or the BART, but the looks I get when I tell people that I use the Casual Carpool are priceless. I mean, didn't all of our mothers teach us not to get into a car with a stranger?

In case you are not familiar with it, it is an informal carpool starting from several places throughout the Bay Area and going into the city. There is no prior arrangement; if you are driving, you go to a corner and wait for people; if you are a person, you go to the corner and wait for a car. When the car has three people, it goes into the city. In the afternoon, they go back to where they came from. The benefit of this is twofold for the driver. By having three people in their car, they get to go through the toll booth in the carpool lane, which not only saves them time (possibly an hour or more during the worst part of rush hour) but also saves them money. It used to be that if you had three or more in your car, you got to go through the toll booth for free. Now it is $2.50 instead of $6.

It sounds great, right? Except I have had people ask me some interesting (and valid) questions such as:

How do you know where to go? There is a list of sites where people meet. It's usually on a corner where the bus stop is, so if you cannot get a car, you can catch the bus at it comes by. That is what I do. If the bus is coming at 7, I go to the corner around 6:45 and wait until either a car comes and fills up or the bus comes. Once you are in the vehicle, be it bus or car, the drive itself takes the same amount of time. However, the car is cheaper. Which brings me to....

Do you have to pay to ride? Oh, now this is the hot topic of the month! Since this is technically informal, aka no rules, but we all want it to continue, there has been no clear black and white answer to this question. Also my friend and I just had a discussion about this. The loose rules are: the driver can ask for a dollar or two and the passenger can choose to give or not AND the passenger can offer a dollar or two and the driver can accept or not. I will tell you that as a passenger, I offer 9 times out of 10 and they accept 7 of those times. So, I pay 70% of the time, but it's only a dollar as opposed to $4.20 for the bus. However, my friend says she never offers as a passenger and that people who want you to pay them will have a little sign, which I have never seen.
 
Do you always ride with strangers? Yes. But, if I go around the same time of day, I often see the same drivers, so you get to know certain people. Usually, these are people in my neighborhood, as the carpool site is only a few blocks away for most of us. So, they are my neighbors.

Do you talk when you are in the car? This is another informal "rule". Supposedly, and I don't know where I heard this, if the driver talks to you, you can talk, but if not, you should keep quiet, as you don't want to distract them. I would say that maybe 20% of the drivers want to talk. Most stay quiet and we listen to NPR. Seriously, there are a lot of NPR fans in the casual carpool group.

Has anything bad every happened to you?  No, but there is a forum where you can post warnings about bad drivers or rude people or whatnot and it does happen. However, it is not a very big forum and the casual carpool has been around for a few decades, so I think that the bad things are minor. Also, you are allowed to skip a car, for instance if a man pulls up in a two-seater, I may give it a pass. Drivers are allowed to refuse passengers as well. I have never seen this happen though.

So, there you have it. The ins and outs of the casual carpool. Tomorrow I will be talking about Riding the Bus. Just kidding. I will probably talk about that next week.FYI for you excel nerds like me: by using the CC, even if I did pay a dollar each time, I would save $16/week! That's a glass and a half of wine at the airport! Or a new sweater at Target! Or...3 burritos! Thanks Casual Carpool!

Do you have a similar program in your area? Have you ever gotten into a car with a stranger / done a ride-share? How do you get to work/school each day?

When Life Hands You Lemons

Lately, my lemon tree has been full. I have plenty of lemons. Life has given me lots of lemons.

I mean this both literally and figuratively.

Figuratively, and I have talked about this before, the job situation is getting a little out of hand. Usually, my job is temporary, and I am used to that. Like I said, I am similar to a freelancer. I work several months of of the year, and during that time, I have to save up for the dry months. However, generally there is a good mix of "wet" and "dry" months, and so I can not only make ends meet pretty easily, but I also keep from going completely crazy with boredom or a lack of productivity.

Right now, I am in a drought. I am California;  I need rain or my crops are going to die.

Luckily, this means I have free time to do what I have always wanted to do. I can learn French; I can knit a sweater; I can go see the Grand Canyon. However, this also means I need to keep saving up, because who knows when that rainy day will come. So I am improvising. The local library has a Spanish conversation class once a month in the evenings. I signed up. I have a long list of books on my To Read list. I am getting to know my neighborhood and the surrounding running trails. I am cooking. I love to cook and often don't make time for it. I am spending time with friends and family. It's good, in a way.

I ALSO actually have a lemon tree. And it has a boatload of lemons. I could make lemonade, but instead, I make hummus!! Have you ever made your own hummus? It's so easy!


Ingredients:
1 cup cooked garbanzo beans
1/4 - 1/2 cup bean water
1 tbsp olive oil
1 - 4 lemons, juiced
1 clove garlic, minced
1 tbsp tahini
salt to taste

In food processor, mix all ingredients and blend until smooth. You want the hummus to be a little bit on the thinner side, as it will thicken a little in the fridge once everything melds together. Start off with the oil and lemon juice, then add 1/4 cup water and see how it looks/tastes before adding the other 1/4 cup of water. When I say bean water, I mean the juice in the can, or if you cook your beans from dry, whatever water is in the cook pot.

Note, if you don't have tahini, it will still taste good, but I do like it better with the tahini. You should be able to find it at Trader Joes, or Whole Foods, although I bought mine at Safeway.

So, I am off to use my lemons of life! Any suggestions, literally or figuratively?

Have you ever made your own hummus? Have you ever been in a life drought and not known when the rains would come?

Hurry Up and Wait


I don’t talk about my work too much, since it’s not really appropriate. However (and isn’t there always a however), I want to talk a little bit about the waiting and the hurrying up.

I work on a temporary basis, contract by contract. I am like a freelance writer. But I am not a freelance writer. Wouldn’t that be cool though? Like a freelance writer, I get called up when there is a job (or story in their case) available. The boss sets the terms. For each contract, the initial work period is generally 90 days, and can be extended out to more, depending on the duration of the job. So, I agree to work for 90 days and then I jump on a plane to wherever the new job is and I start working. Hence the “hurry up”. Usually 72 hours or less (usually more like 24 hours) after I get a call, I am on a plane heading somewhere new.

Sometimes the work lasts 90 days. Sometimes it lasts for years. Usually, as long as I work at least the agreed upon 90 days, I can leave afterwards at any time. Generally, I do not leave after only 90 days; I would rather work as long as I can, since afterwards it is unknown as to how long I will have before the next contract.

Right now I am in the “wait” portion. This is where I have finished my last contract and am waiting for a call for the next. Each part has its ups and downs. Both the hurry up and the wait make it hard to plan the rest of your life. Will the current job last for 90 days or 900? Will I wait for days or weeks or maybe even months for the next job to come along? Financially, it can be hard. You work and save but you are not sure how much you need to save and then you have time off but you try to be frugal in case another job doesn’t come along soon.

Mentally, it is difficult. I gave up my (great) apartment in San Francisco because I couldn’t justify spending that much money each month on rent when I was never home. So, all my things are in storage and when I am in between jobs I stay with my parents. This is fine for a few weeks, but when weeks turn into months I start to wonder what I am doing with my life. I start to think that maybe it is worth spending money each month, just to have a place to come home to and to call my own. Does anyone want to rent me a very nice apartment in San Francisco for less than $500? No? I didn’t think so.

Then I get the call again and I hurry out the door once more and my angst about needing space and a place to hang my hat goes by the wayside. New fears take its place. Remember when I talked about change? Starting over again every so often is hard. I end up in a strange place and don’t know the lay of the land or the people. This can be fun and exciting, but it can also be scary and tedious. It’s like a new relationship. First dates are fun and exciting, but isn’t it nice when you get to year one and you know everything about each other and you are comfortable? I sometimes get tired of going on yet another “first date” and having to ask the same questions over and over. I want to be comfortable.

I guess what I am trying to say is that it’s not very often that I am comfortable. Whether I am hurrying up or waiting, I am a little on edge. I am a little uncertain at all times. Will I get a job? When will I get one? Now that I have one, will I do a good job? Will I get along with the new client/boss/coworkers? How long will this last? Doubt is not fun. Luckily it is not always there. It comes and it goes. Just like me. Coming and going. Hurrying up and waiting.

Is there a situation where you have doubted yourself? What was the result?

Going Round in Circles

You may remember the post that I wrote when I first got to Missouri. I was just getting back into running. I had just arrived in Columbia and had found a great running trail: the MKT. The day I wrote that post, I ran 2.5 miles at a 9:33 pace. It was not easy. At the same time, I set a few goals for myself. They were:

1. Find a training program
2. Get in Shape.
3. Speed up pace.
4. Sign up for a Fall race. 

After the day of that run, I was sent to Cape Girardeau, which is about 4 hours south of Columbia (and also the home of Rush Limbaugh). I didn't get to run on that trail but that once.

Tomorrow, I am leaving Missouri. Remember the change I was talking about? It's changed again. Instead of moving to a different place in Missouri, I will be heading home for a while to see some friends and family and regroup and wait for the next job to come along.

The job here has been good. I have met and worked with some interesting people and been involved in some interesting situations. I have to say I am not totally sad that I am leaving at the onset of winter. I spent a winter in Iowa and as much as I love snow, I do not love -47 degree windchill. But I was not quite ready to go home. Oh well. I am now.

Before we leave, we have to check out through our office in Columbia. So I drove to Columbia to get all the logistics taken care of. After taking care of that, I took my last run (ever? for a while?) in Missouri. It was a lot different from the one I took 4 months ago. The weather was about 30 degrees cooler and the fall colors are out. I have satisfied all my goals from above.

1. Find a training program Hal Higdon
2. Get in Shape. lost 10 lbs
3. Speed up pace. current average: 8:45
4. Sign up for a Fall race. (x3)

What wasn't different was the trail. I went back to the location of my first ever run in Missouri and did my last run in the same place. It was very therapeutic. It felt like a place I already knew.

I have come full circle. 




Goodbye Mizzou-rah.

Have you ever been to a place that you just can't wait to go back to? That has a special place in your heart? Where is it and why did you love it?

Can You Spare Some Change?


Just when I think I have learned the way to live, life changes.
Hugh Prather

I bet you thought I was going to talk about money. Well, I'm not. I AM going to talk about change, but not the dollar and cents kind. 

I have been working in the same location for about 3 months. I have a manager who I finally figured out what he wants. I have coworkers who I know and trust and can call up if I need advice or help or a coffee break. I have clients that I have developed a relationship with. They know me (and maybe even like me). I have a running trail and I know exactly how long it takes to get there and back and where each mile point is. I have a grocery store close by. I know exactly how long it takes to get to the airport from here. I have a kitchen in my hotel room and I can make a big meal and stockpile it for the week.

Well, just like Mr. Prather (above) says, just when you get comfortable, boom! That is when things change. We have finished our work here and are moving on today, to a new city, with new clients, a new manager, and new coworkers. I will be in a new hotel and have to figure out where the best place to run is. I don't WANT to have to figure it out. I want to be where I know what I am doing. I hate the feeling of not knowing. I don't have time to check it out. I want to know NOW. (Violet Beauregard anyone!?)   

The only hotel is a Holiday Inn. No kitchen. I will be lucky if I have a fridge and a coffee pot. Not that I am snobby about the hotel, but I do like to have certain amenities to help me eat cheaper and healthier. I have not yet found any running trails. I have to run 17 miles the weekend after next. I really don't want to have to run on the streets the whole time. 

Some people like change. A new hairdo, new house, new dinner menu or new friends. I am not adverse to any of those...sometimes... but usually I stick with what I know, the same long hair, a big pot of chili and that great girlfriend who you can tell anything to. Those are comfortable. They take less time and effort. So maybe that is what is scary about change, you have to take more time and work harder in order to make it work.  Or maybe you just anticipate having to work harder, whether that is the reality or not.

I am sure I will go to the new place and then new manager will be a great guy and all my new coworkers will be very helpful and the running trail will eventually be found and my new hotel will have free healthy dinners ever day (okay I just made that one up). It's hard, starting at the beginning again. But I've done it over and over, as much as I don't like it (and let me tell you, that's a lot). And I can do it again. Everything will work out in the end. I know everything will be fine. But right now I am not looking forward to it.  

Do you like change? What is a big change that has happened in your life recently? How did you deal with it? 

***Also, we have a winner for the My Memories Giveaway... picked by Random.org***
** Lisa of Lisa's Yarns ** 
I will contact you via email to confirm details!