New Year. New You. New Start? The Choice is Yours.

Upon reading posts on Facebook, browsing pins on Pintrests, and seeing pictures on Instagram, I find that that "new years" often makes people cynical. There are those that mock the "new year, new me" mentality, and then there are people who are desperate for it. I see both sides. 

What I believe most about a "new year" is that nothing in your life will change or be different unless you are willing to work for it. Circumstances do not change unless you do.

Here we are six days into 2015. I feel tried. I am worn out from the holidays. Work has been as crazy and hectic as ever; and I find myself stating that constantly. I believe I need to come to the conclusion that is not going to change. Parallel to work, there was copious amounts of travel, lack of sleep, lots of food, and RLS flare-up's. 

I think a lot of us feel worn out from the holidays and sad that they are over. Therefore, a "new year" mentality is just the bit of hope to get one back on track and provide a goal to work and hope for. Right now, I need that. 

But then I remember that everyday is a new start if you give it that power. No matter how many times you have slipped on your diet, said "no" to a workout, bought that purse when you needed to save the money... everyday is another chance to get it right. Everyday is another chance to try again. Do not focus on that bad choices of yesterday, focus on how you can make positive choices today... right now.

That is what I am going to do. I have let loose, enjoyed myself thoroughly, and now I need to get back to work. Life is all about "finding the balance", and I am glad I enjoyed myself and veered off of my normal tightly structured schedule, as it enabled me to breathe and try new things, which also resulted in me missing my structure! For a while I was bored of it... now I crave it. 

This is a new year, and it is bringing an abundance of changes for me-- a big part is sharing my life with someone else now. Which in itself is a fun, new journey, though stressful at times. 

Take control and be kind to yourself. A lot of people are in that "after holiday" slump. Ease into a new routine that implement the changes you want to make in your life. Diving in too hard into those changes can result in drowning yourself -- crashing and burning. Changing a little at a time creates consistency and consistency is what forms habits. That is what your new changes need to become -- a habit, something you always find yourself doing. That is how I lost weight. That is how I fell in love with exercising. That is how I changed the way I look at myself. Those positive changes that resulted into new habits are what make it easier for me to reset my mind and fall back into a healthy structure. 

So, here we go. From my oily, greasy hair that is carelessly thrown into a bun with my coffee stained pants, I say Happy 2015 and let's make it the best yet. 

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Why I have been MIA from Blogging and what has been going on

Hello Blogging world! Did you notice that my blog has been "deleted" for almost 2 weeks? Well, shame on you if you didn't. Kidding.

Have you ever heard of the saying by Marilyn Monroe; sometimes GOOD things fall apart so better things come together? Or if you are of Christian faith like I am, "God has perfect timing". "It's all apart of God's plan"?

Perhaps you have heard the most famous saying:

Everything happens for a reason.

Can I please tell you that I am cold, hard, living proof that ALL of the above quotes are TRUE.

Let me explain what has been happening...

As a lot of my friends know, my current job was downsizing. This was the third "downsize" in nearly 2 1/2 years. I have been there since day one and I just felt that the time had come for me to move on and venture into a new career. However, the best way to do that is to have a new job lined up before I leave my current one. So, that's what I did. I obtained an Executive Assistant position for a blooming Real Estate company. My last day at my job was Friday, October 18th and my new job as the Executive Assistant was starting on Tuesday, October 22nd. I talked about that on a lot of my blog entries. The job was Uptown Charlotte and I found a brand new apartment ONE block from my new job. I could walk to work, walk to restaurants, bars, etc. Everything sounds great, right?

That Saturday, the 19th, to celebrate my new job, I went to Greensboro to stay with my grandma and grandpa, and my mom even came up to stay as well. We grilled steaks, looked through old pictures, drank wine, and it was just the best night. Sunday, my grandmother was going to take me shopping for gorgeous new office clothes. We wake up bright and early Sunday morning, get dressed and dolled up, then take off for a day of shopping. 

Once my grandmother and I set out for our fun day off shopping, my cell phone rings. It was the CEO of the real estate company. She told me my job offer was rescinded. And to be honest, I have no idea what happened. "Upon further review, we are not going to be a good fit". NC is an "at will" employment state, which means you can be hired, fired, and anything in between without reason at any time. When she told me that via telephone, my entire world fell apart. The apartment I was so damn excited about? Gone. My new career? Gone. I was going to have to file for unemployment which I probably would not even be approved for since I resigned from my last job, barely be able to pay my bills, and maybe lose everything. When you have no source of income and are not sure when you can obtain a new job - what can you do? 

I am the type of person who measures a lot of my confidence, self actualization, and self worth by my career. My grandmother is the same way, so is my dad. It runs in my family. Sure, it may not be politically correct, but it is what it is.

I felt humiliated. I was so excited and I had told everyone. I was making huge plans. And with a 3 minute phone call, everything was taken. I can't tell you the pain, anxiety attacks, and tears that followed that call. I could not drive home that Sunday because I was so distraught. So, last Monday the drive of shame back to Charlotte commenced. I called my prior boss, sister, Kelly, and the closest people of my life to let them know what happened.

Marquis took me out for pizza when I got back and I hit the ground. It was time to start over. The worst thing I could do was keep harping on what happened and beating myself up. Last week I worked out, did some deep cleaning, and researched company after company applying for jobs and sending my resume for them to keep on file for future openings. I probably contacted over 300 companies.

Sunday night when I was Googling different companies in the Ballantyne Corporate Park (aka the land of opportunity) I saw an investment firm that seemed VERY interesting. Since I previously worked for an investment firm, I thought I would email them. They did not have any job postings on their website, but I did not let that stop me.

The very next morning the President of the company emailed me and told me that he had been interviewing for an Executive Assistant/Office Manager, and he was close to making a decision, but if I could come in that day at 3 PM, he would interview me. So, I got my crap together and I was in his office at 3 PM sharp. The office was in the heart of the corporate park on the fourth floor, overlooking the lake, and was very modern and chic. It felt like "home" being there. I had a great interview. He told he liked my drive and my spunk. (LOL... spunk, huh?) Today, I got the call that he wants me to join his company. I graciously accepted, and I start FRIDAY! This has been some process; interview on Monday, offered the job on Wednesday, and I start Friday.

The President of this company is amazing. He has a stellar sense of humor and we got along great. I am also getting a significant pay raise. Plus, full benefits. Everything makes sense now. I am SO happy. The absolute happiest I have ever been. Now that I have come through the dark, I want to be back at my blog documenting this crazy, ever changing life.

Grandma and I finally had our shopping day today, and man was it successful.

Well guys that is it for now. I have missed you all so much. I can't wait to catch up and see what everyone has been up too!

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Life is all about change

I am trying to gather my thoughts and put myself together right now. Writing helps. This week has been one of the most emotionally draining weeks I have ever had. As we have always heard "it is darkest before dawn". And now is when I have to believe it.

This week started off with a text message from my step mother at 7:30 on Monday morning. My dad had two seizures Sunday night. My dad has been battling incurable cancer for exactly 2 years now. Though it is incurable, he is receiving the best treatment from Duke. He can lead a semi-normal life. There are a lot of ups and downs, but over the past 6-8 months, the disease has been very doormat and under control. I don't know how much longer than it is going to last though. Having a father with incurable cancer and a mother with the incurable disease MS, is very heartbreaking. I do not speak about it, write about it, or complain about it to anyone because it is something no one can change. Sometimes I like to pretend it does not exist. It's not denial, but an escape. Anyways, my dad is back home now and taking a lot of medication. He had some swelling in his head from his brain tumors. He will go back to Duke for more radiation once the swelling goes down. I spoke to him earlier and thankfully he sounds in good spirit. My dad is a fighter, I know that much. He refuses to let cancer get the best of him. I love you, Dad.

Wednesday, I must have eaten something bad. Wednesday evening I was SO sick. I am still reeling from the effects. Not to be gross, but I have never thrown up so much in my life. On my way home, I had to pull over twice so I could "get it out me", I only live 10 minutes from work too. It passed within a few hours, but it was unbearable. I still feel weak from it. 

On top of the issues with my father, I am resigning from my job in a couple of weeks. The meeting came to a head yesterday. This is heartbreaking but happy at the same time. Horrible and great. I do not know how it is all of those things at one time, but it is. I am very lucky because I have my mother and a wonderful fiance standing behind of me through all of this. I have written about my job before  and the downhill turn things have taken for the past year, and now the company has hit the bottom. It is sad because you always want to root for a small, start up company, but with every risk there comes either a reward or penalty. You do not always win. We are a very small company, over the past two and a half years we have been more family than co-workers, that is the hardest part about it all. Thankfully, I will be able to collect unemployment, and I will be right back in the job market looking for something new. Marquis is in the works of a new business I could run, but I don't know if I want to do that. I do not know what is next, but I am going to look at all different kinds of ventures. I may not be on Blogger as much as I am applying and interviewing, but I will still be here.

So in true Friday fashion, I am going to write 5 great things about my week. No matter how hard life gets, we can always see the good in things, right?

1) My Hump Day b l o g h o p 

Ladies, you all amaze me. You guys helped me spread the word and we had nearly 80 link up's our first time. Plus over 1,500 views. My co-host gained 12 new readers and I loved hearing about you guys finding new friends and blogs. To me, this is what Blogging is all about - making new friends, networking, and coming together as a community. Sometimes I like writing on my blog and telling you guys about my life, more than I do to people in real life. So thank you for helping me make Wednesday a success. I look forward to doing this every week and promoting my next co-hosts.

2) I p s y and M a r y K a y

I came home on Monday to my first Ipsy bag, Mary Kay foundation and "Makeup Stay Spray". I have not use much from my Ipsy bag yet, but I did try the red Cailyn lip stain. Holy crap I love it! I always love receiving new mascara so I cannot wait to try it out. I will die with my Mary Kay foundation so I was happy to receive that and I am excited to try the new makeup stay spray. I have read about Urban Decay's stay spray but since I love my Mary Kay girl, I thought I would try theirs first. I hope it works!

3) P o l a r FT4

My new Polar arrived Tuesday! I am so happy to finally have this for the gym. It is more than just a heart rate monitor, it is a challenge. I am excited to keep up with how many calories I burn and what zone I am training it. I want to push myself to burn more calories and beat yesterday's goal. Another great thing - I only paid $60 for it, plus free shipping. Ladies, do not pay $90-120 for this, pay $60 like I did. You can purchase it here.

4) My mama is in town. There is nothing better than having your mom come see you after a very hard week. We are having a blast. I love my mom way too much. I am 24 years old and I still get like a baby around her. And in my true mother's fashion (you guys know how she is on Facebook) here is what she has said:

Brantley is my brother's son, her one year old grandson. I think I may break it to her that she is famous on my blog, ha ha!

5) I needed some fun in my life last night. Mom, Marquis, and I all went to the White Water Center for drinks and live music, and took the pups with us for extra added fun. It was a great time and much needed.

Mama, Marquis, and a couple of the pups @ Whitewater Center

Now I am ready for the weekend, I hope you guys have a great one!

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Holy Sh!+ What a Day!

Okay y'all... I just need to breathe for a second.

My brain is all over the place right now.

It's all good stuff at least!

I am marrying an entrepreneur. And it's a crazy life.

Marquis, the future worse half of myself, is 44 years old and from a small town in upstate NY. He grew up dirt poor. I'm talking a house built in the 1800's with no air conditioner, and the only way they ate was from their farm. He went into the Army; graduated number 1 in bootcamp for his physical fitness, then after he discharged from the military, he put himself through Ithaca college and graduated with honors. Even with severe ADHD. And honey, he still has that ADHD today.

He is a pretty driven man.

He just sold his two main businesses that have been operation since the year 2000. They were tanning salons; he sold them to a major franchise in the US. 

Over the past 6 weeks we have been working hard and now he is ready to open a new one.

Since marketing and advertising are my things, we have completely redone the tanning salon and what makes ours different and unique. I can't wait to share everything on here with you guys in the next month or two.

But we have some questions. The main one being: Where the hell are we going to put it?

There is one location in Charlotte (where we live and are established now) but if we open that location, it takes virtually every dime he made off of the sale of the old salons. That's a big pretty big risk. Especially because I don't trust the shopping center it would be in. It's in one of the most upscale places in Charlotte, but I am telling you guys, something just doesn't feel right. Just ask all the little restaurants that have opened and closed.

We have been talking for over a year now about buying a condo and Myrtle, opening a business there and kind of going back and fourth. I would be in Myrtle full time but he would still keep the house in Charlotte (for the time being) and go back and fourth.

Today he spoke with a man in Myrtle who is selling a really awesome tanning salon. Great location, great beds and Mystic HD, PLUS it would cost freaking 75% less than Charlotte to open it. We could pay cash today and still have a H U G E cushion. We are touring it Saturday.

We are also touring a bar/grille (my top choice to buy), an ice-cream shoppe, and a house to buy and rent out to people.

He then told me he spoke with a realtor and we are touring 6 condo's on Saturday to potentially live in.

Home sweet...home?

HOLY CRAP.

We could buy a condo and the tanning salon in Myrtle BOTH and still be spending 30% less than what it would take to open the one in Charlotte.

This picture has nothing to do with anything, but it makes me happy.

We are also considering selling or renting out our house in Charlotte because though it looks small(ish) on the outside it is HUGE in the inside. The only reason we bought it because it was such a good business investment. See, there is that business again.

Either way, I think Myrtle is clearly a better and cheaper choice. Plus, like I have said before, I was a fish in my past life and I was meant to be on the water.

Our anniversary trip is turning into a business development trip... why am I not surprised!!! LOL... just another day in the life! 

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